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When the Watch Stopped
Contributed by
thewordzwithin
on
Wednesday, 13th October 2004 @ 03:46:24 PM in AEST
Topic:
LovePoetry
|
I had many dreams about her before, but never one like this
Like the one I had about us having our very first kiss
But this one was different
Because I was the one on the race track while she sat in the stands
I wasnt racing for any medal
I was racing to be her man
It was weird because the race was divided into three parts
And who ever won all three
Won her heart
The first event was the long jump and I won that hands down
Because theres no mountain too high
Nothing that could be found
That could keep me from her love
But I knew that this wasnt enough
The next event was the hurdles and that was no contest
Because Id jump hurdles all day
Just to feel her lay on my chest
While watching a movie at home
I would never dream of leaving her alone
Which is why I must win the last race
Victory was like her kiss
Close enough to taste
And oddly enough, the last race was just a straight dash to the finish line
And I knew after this
Shed be mine
When the gun sounded, I took a commanding lead
I felt I was running as fast as one of those Kentucky Derby steeds
And as I approached the finish line
I thought this would be a perfect time to take
A moment to think about the beautiful life together we would make
But when the watch stopped
I thought this must be fate
Because it seems, I was one second too late
Copyright ©
thewordzwithin
... [
2004-10-13 15:46:24]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: When the Watch Stopped
(User Rating: 1 )
by Dorian on
Wednesday, 13th October 2004 @ 03:53:48 PM AEST
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a Message)
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this is beautiful, well written and touching, a fine peice of writting, u know your craft well, don't ever stop writting these kind of poems dispite the
jelliousy it may envoke . . . Dorian |
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Re: When the Watch Stopped
(User Rating: 1 )
by Archie on
Wednesday, 13th October 2004 @ 04:00:23 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| This is a great poem for many reasons. Your poem poses a hidden question, Is it possible to love some one too much? Your poem draws a far greater lesson than might appear at first. Great job. |
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Re: When the Watch Stopped
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jenni_K on
Wednesday, 13th October 2004 @ 04:14:21 PM AEST
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Wow!! This was an awesome write!!
I was actually sitting in the stands rooting for you... and was kinda disappointed to see that you were one second too late.....
Keep hoping...
Jenni |
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Re: When the Watch Stopped
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Thursday, 14th October 2004 @ 04:02:09 AM AEST
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Wow now this one rocks, my friend.
It's a masterpeice of beauty even tho sad but never give up! U never really know how things mite go.
It's not always bad to come in second as there's always another race to run.
Keep the faith.
luv, huggs, smiles, faith,
emy |
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Re: When the Watch Stopped
(User Rating: 1 )
by brew on
Thursday, 14th October 2004 @ 09:03:13 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| Oh....no..........seems you maybe should o f waited to think that thought........but we are all humans, and take what we need to make the serenity of all. Was an ortradianary write..captured exactly what you want, and you are trying to get it. Beautiful..........Thanks for sharing.~ |
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