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Time
Contributed by
gillmor_t
on
Tuesday, 23rd November 2004 @ 08:08:50 AM in AEST
Topic:
happypoetry
|
Clock Clock.... time is gold
time is hope.... time is slow
time is flow....
life will grow.... life will end
life has starts.... life has ends
Somone die's.... somone hi's
Somone see's.... somone leaves
hope is time.... time will hope
dont waste it.... dont face it
time is love.... time is fear
dont fear wat u hear
clock clock
tic tac
let's move on
let's try hard
keep it safe
keep ur fate
Don't be late!
Copyright ©
gillmor_t
... [
2004-11-23 08:08:50]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Time
(User Rating: 1 )
by Daniela_Maria_Violin on
Tuesday, 23rd November 2004 @ 08:59:23 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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| could use some editing but this is pretty good. nice job! |
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Re: Time
(User Rating: 1 )
by Stitch on
Tuesday, 23rd November 2004 @ 09:25:23 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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Now I like this.
You still need work on your spelling and use of contractions...or is that intentional? If it is, sometimes it can work, but I'm not sure it does here. Either way, this is intriguing, so that's a good start.
Stitch |
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