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Everlasting Light Drowning in You
Contributed by
highly_flammable
on
Tuesday, 30th November 2004 @ 07:56:50 PM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
Youre my one, my only one
Loves before, Ive had none
I know for me, youre Mr. Right
Because youre my everlasting light
Into your creul eyes I look,
My life unfolds in front of me
Im drowning and I cant swim
Forever imprisioned, and never free
Copyright ©
highly_flammable
... [
2004-11-30 19:56:50]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Everlasting Light Drowning in You
(User Rating: 1 )
by Essentially9 on
Tuesday, 30th November 2004 @ 09:13:34 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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| for your second poem you need to find something that rhymes with look or swim if you want to make it a rhyme type poem. the first poem i cant help with because of what i think on the issue, but on the second one you could go on to say why you are this way, and how you will try to get out of it. ::shrugs:: |
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Re: Everlasting Light Drowning in You
(User Rating: 1 )
by alyssakoren_03 on
Thursday, 2nd December 2004 @ 04:38:45 PM AEST
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| i thought it was beautiful and so was your other poem your a very talented young lady luv ya bunches |
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Re: Everlasting Light Drowning in You
(User Rating: 1 )
by afterdark on
Tuesday, 11th January 2005 @ 07:55:46 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| Try spell check please first off..Add more content to the writes..Your not giving much for the reader to really get into. |
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