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Rail to nowhere
Contributed by
namesaretaken
on
Thursday, 2nd December 2004 @ 08:26:17 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
The tracks lead a winding path
Off into the distant darkness
You ride among the damned
With droopy wet terry clothe faces
Bitter expressions stare trace your moves
Heckling laughter fill the cabin
They mock your choice of transit
Only now you realize your error
Will you every get off?
Dont ask me
Copyright ©
namesaretaken
... [
2004-12-02 20:26:17]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Rail to nowhere
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 2nd December 2004 @ 09:34:32 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
Great deep poem nat! I loved your use of imagery here.
I especially enjoyed the eerieness of it.
Now I wanna know what happens next....
Excellent write!!
~Breezy |
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Re: Rail to nowhere
(User Rating: 1 )
by Silent-No-More on
Thursday, 2nd December 2004 @ 10:55:36 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Ahhhh... a train full of damned souls, bound for nowhere. Intriguing write, nat. I agree with Breezy - there's an eerie sort of feeling that comes along with this write. AND, I too am anxious to hear more of the journey.
Keep writing,
~SNM~ |
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Re: Rail to nowhere
(User Rating: 1 )
by venkat on
Thursday, 2nd December 2004 @ 11:18:43 PM AEST
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| "Will you every get off?"..I don't know what to say..but very the poem is very sharp to the point..its a brilliant write.venkat |
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