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For all the times I tried
Contributed by
Kitty_cat
on
Wednesday, 8th December 2004 @ 02:05:49 PM in AEST
Topic:
LostLove
|
Trying to impress you with my dress Trying to dazzle you with my smile Trying to make you think I'm sorta pretty Hoping it will all be worthwhile
Trying to turn you on with my body Trying to shine out from the rest Trying to make you see we belong Make you see I suit you best
Trying to strike you with my beauty Trying to astound you with my eyes Trying to electrify you with my chest Wishing feelings will soon arise
Trying to amaze you with my words Trying to stun you unaware Trying to make you realise our connection Know of the chemistry we share
Trying to overwhelm you with it's perfume Trying to catch you in love's trap Trying to seize and clasp your heart To fill my hollow soul's gap
Trying to make you see me as me Trying to make you need me near Trying to make you whisper softly Those words I long to hear
Trying to make you return the emotions Awaiting that amazing day When you will smile and look at me In that dazed, loving way
Trying to help you want me, need me But you will never relieve my plea Ive been trying so long to make you fonder Now theres no point in trying any longer But I will continue to strive to make you mine Will continue to worship you, my shrine As my love for you eats me from the inside For all those times I tried and tried
Copyright ©
Kitty_cat
... [
2004-12-08 14:05:49] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: For all the times I tried
(User Rating: 1 ) by CrimsonTears on
Wednesday, 8th December 2004 @ 02:12:38 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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i can relate to this poem so well....excellent write....great job
Lots of Love
CrimsonTears |
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Re: For all the times I tried
(User Rating: 1 ) by in2thetwilightzone2 on
Wednesday, 8th December 2004 @ 02:13:43 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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this is a beautiful piece
i especially like the opening paragraph:
Trying to impress you with my dress
Trying to dazzle you with my smile
Trying to make you think I'm sorta pretty
Hoping it will all be worthwhile
i can really relate,
i think your rhyming scheme is brilliant, it's fantastic and it dosnt even cheapen the poem, it just gives it emotional rythm.
i really enjoyed reading it!!!!!!!! thx!!!!!
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx |
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Re: For all the times I tried
(User Rating: 1 ) by Mesano on
Wednesday, 8th December 2004 @ 03:10:16 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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wonderful poem, i really enjoyed reading it... although i have never quite been in that situation, i can see how people could easily relate to it
-Nicki |
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Re: For all the times I tried
(User Rating: 1 ) by catharinep on
Wednesday, 8th December 2004 @ 03:54:46 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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I really like this poem, although it is sad. For all the 'trying' I hoped succession followed, somehow. |
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