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killer instinct
Contributed by
Hannah_Heaven
on
Wednesday, 8th December 2004 @ 03:37:31 PM in AEST
Topic:
EmotionalPoetry
|
lethal weapons exploding
your knife losens
the blood spilt flows
you murderer how could you?
killer!!!!!!
you think your so tough
but inside your yearning
for a life of peace and justice
you cant help shooting down the people you love most
the things you live for
now there is no reason
you lose your breath
you waste your soul
you die inside
just because your instinct
your head spins
your aim collides
and your victims die
just because
you,your sick
you evil THING
your killer soul tormented
your killer instinct building
patience is not a virtu its a sin
Copyright ©
Hannah_Heaven
... [
2004-12-08 15:37:31]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: killer instinct
(User Rating: 1 )
by Essentially9 on
Wednesday, 8th December 2004 @ 09:11:19 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| interesting concept, well presented. |
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Re: killer instinct
(User Rating: 1 )
by pixie on
Thursday, 9th December 2004 @ 05:08:08 AM AEST
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a Message)
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great write, missed your poems,
pixie xx |
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Re: killer instinct
(User Rating: 1 )
by Essentially9 on
Saturday, 26th February 2005 @ 10:43:29 PM AEST
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a Message)
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well i came across your poem again, and decided to comment on it again, because it was that good. from the first i liked your description of the poem, but it seems like the whole "youre sick bit" just kind of ruined it. i think you can do without stating you every time also. it is seen from the first bit that it is about someone else. also another good spin would be to make it in first person singular.
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Re: killer instinct
(User Rating: 1 )
by Petznick on
Tuesday, 1st March 2005 @ 12:01:22 AM AEST
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i relate to this but not in the literal way you wrote it. i always question who people (myself included) make fun of people to build up their own self-esteem. this poem relates to that for me
LATES
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