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A Toast
Contributed by
wolfman
on
Thursday, 9th December 2004 @ 07:00:02 PM in AEST
Topic:
Suicide
|
A Toast
My bittersweet drink will you help me cope
With my life empty of hope
It hurts me now that she is gone
Even thought it has been so long
I here that she is doing well
As I suffer in my hell
Her family is happy with childern and dog
My life is miserable I do not belong
So i ask again my bittersweet friend
Will you help me bring it all to an end?
I have tried the blade I have tried the gun
They are all to messy and no real fun
But with this drink I do believe
That of this pain I will be relieved
As I sit and write the note
I shed the final tear of all my hope
To my family and my firends
I'm sorry, my life is at it's end...
And with my friend of arsenic and gin
I toast to her picture and grin
"To Sylvia my love, a toast"
He drinks
"Farewell"
Copyright ©
wolfman
... [
2004-12-09 19:00:02]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: A Toast
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Thursday, 9th December 2004 @ 07:04:57 PM AEST
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It's very sad but written well. U conveinced me but I hope it's jus wrting.
Welcome to our global family here.
luv, huggs,
emy |
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Re: A Toast
(User Rating: 1 )
by Nazmythian on
Thursday, 9th December 2004 @ 07:21:58 PM AEST
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Well written, nice flow, easy to read structurally, though not a fan of the subject matter. Welcome to YPDC ... here you'll find a home.
Nazmythian ~ |
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Re: A Toast
(User Rating: 1 )
by greeneyes on
Thursday, 9th December 2004 @ 09:09:23 PM AEST
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Strong emotions expressed, excellent writting, this feels so real.
Nancy |
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Re: A Toast
(User Rating: 1 )
by Essentially9 on
Thursday, 9th December 2004 @ 09:43:54 PM AEST
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| excellent write. welcome. =]] |
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Re: A Toast
(User Rating: 1 )
by pixie on
Friday, 10th December 2004 @ 05:25:04 AM AEST
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welcome, this poem was so tragic and very hard hitting, hope these are just words and not something you are thinking about doing
pixie xx |
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Re: A Toast
(User Rating: 1 )
by DesolantDreamer on
Saturday, 11th December 2004 @ 03:39:17 PM AEST
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| Wow. Very emotional. I like it. Good job. |
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Re: A Toast
(User Rating: 1 )
by Fionndruinne on
Saturday, 11th December 2004 @ 11:26:03 PM AEST
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*walks through the door cloaked and hooded, like, yes, then*
Welcome, welcome. I do hope you enjoy yourself.
Quite a good piece, especially for a first (as I said before). Do keep it up.
Andrew |
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Re: A Toast
(User Rating: 1 )
by DamentedSuicide on
Sunday, 12th December 2004 @ 01:04:03 PM AEST
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welcome to YPDC
wonderful poem
well ritten
'love can destroy a man
bringing him to his knees
then his love will turn to selfhatred
for he feels he is the reason she left
but just remember that it is better
to have loved and lost
than to have never loved at all'
~~~Raven~~~ |
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Re: A Toast
(User Rating: 1 )
by witch_derna on
Wednesday, 15th December 2004 @ 05:22:02 AM AEST
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Another great write Josh :) Looking forward to reading more when you return. I havent been a member here long either, but everone here is very nice. Welcome.
Blessings.
MaDonna |
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Re: A Toast
(User Rating: 1 )
by Wachumiri on
Saturday, 18th December 2004 @ 06:47:58 PM AEST
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*Walks in with a staff*
As I said before, Josh, a very good first poem. I also see that you've not been idle, so I'll just go and meander over to the your next one.
Take care.
David |
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