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just a moment longer.....
Contributed by
justjonesy
on
Friday, 10th December 2004 @ 04:23:39 AM in AEST
Topic:
LostLove
|
if you listen..... just a little closer and if you would stay..... just a moment longer You might be able to hear these drops of regret fall into the bucket And you might be able to see these drops of sweet "sorry" filling up the bottle
I told myself this is no fault of my own and blamed it on your fear of being alone
but if I bring you..... just a little closer and if I could hold you..... just a moment longer I might be able to take back those drops of regret and empty that bucket And I might be able to soak up those drops of sweet "sorry" and break open that bottle
We made this fairy tale into a very short story You deserved a much better ending and for this..... I am very very sorry.....
Copyright ©
justjonesy
... [
2004-12-10 04:23:39] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: just a moment longer.....
(User Rating: 1 ) by Kindredblood_dragon on
Friday, 10th December 2004 @ 04:29:40 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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| Beautifully tender and composed with such compassion and feeling...awesome poem. |
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Re: just a moment longer.....
(User Rating: 1 ) by pixie on
Friday, 10th December 2004 @ 05:11:36 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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sad and a very deep write,you defenatly write from the heart,
pixie xx |
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Re: just a moment longer.....
(User Rating: 1 ) by girish on
Friday, 10th December 2004 @ 05:54:09 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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very good write
girish |
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Re: just a moment longer.....
(User Rating: 1 ) by Spike on
Saturday, 11th December 2004 @ 12:43:47 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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I really enjoyed this one, and read it a few times. A plaintive, regretful poem but one written so well that it is not overly bitter or maudlin. Most excellent.
Spike |
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Re: just a moment longer.....
(User Rating: 1 ) by Jenn2004 on
Saturday, 11th December 2004 @ 08:41:29 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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| Beautiful Poem, thanks for commenting on mine!!! |
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Re: just a moment longer.....
(User Rating: 1 ) by girltranscended on
Saturday, 16th April 2005 @ 02:01:54 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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We made this fairy tale
into a very short story
You deserved a much better ending
and for this.....
I am very very sorry.....
Anyone who relates to this- must just deeply ache here, an inner understanding, the unspoken regret we carry and live with like an old memory (that will never fade) that we only take out once in awhile.
Another great write!
:) |
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