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My Christmas Tree is Homosexual
Contributed by
ladyaryssa
on
Monday, 13th December 2004 @ 04:47:37 PM in AEST
Topic:
sarcasticpoetry
|
My Christmas tree is Homosexual
Second edition
I
Congratulations, society
Once again youve forced me to play Devils Advocate.
You know Im not the biggest fan of Christmas
I just dont get why we need a Season of Goodwill,
An excuse to be nice.
Do we really need two weeks off from work
And the compulsion to spend a lot of money
Before we can be nice for a month or so?
Even so,
Id rather have a month of people being decent
Than no time at all.
Plus, we all need a break sometime
And a reason to have a good time
Forget about the diet, the job, school
Isnt that what Christmas is all about?
Apparently not;
Christmas is about us enforcing our beliefs on others
Politicians said so on TV so it must be true.
All the Jews, Muslims, Pagans, politicians
That dont approve of Christmas:
Were just intentionally ***** them off, arent we.
II
I know less Christians than I have fingers
But I know very few people who dont celebrate Christmas.
Ive know Muslims and Jehovahs Witnesses
To give Christmas cards:
Those Nativity-wielding insults to political correctness
(Since when were politics ever correct?)
To sinning, Christmas-celebrating friends
And even give gifts.
None of my non-Christian friends
(Nearly all my friends are non-Christian
Including my own family)
Have a problem with Christmas
Not even the Muslims and Jews I know
And its not them you see mouthing off on the telly
Your beliefs offend me;
I cant believe that you believe
Its not more insulting to speak for those
Who are perfectly capable of speaking for themselves
Than to force them into enduring the infinite torture
Of looking at evidence of a festival
They dont necessarily celebrate.
III
Of course, if were going to ban Christmas
We may as well ban other stuff too; do the thing properly.
After all, were all about being proper now.
What about:
Diwali, Hanukah, Easter, Halloween
(Oh, I forgot, you already started on that one
Halloween celebrators are Satanists now).
I personally find candle arches very offensive,
And dont get me started on henna hand-art!
As for Easter, well!
Chocolate eggs are pointless consumer products
And so, so bad for our childrens health.
Im surprised youre not using that excuse instead;
Consumerism seems like a much better excuse than
Complaints made by politicians on behalf of the
Jewish, Hindu and Moslem parts of our society.
Oh, men of power, standing proud
Enthroned in your seats of the power we bestowed
Tell me now, oh tell me true
How doth it be that we offend you?
When was it that you became
Such anti-religious men?
Or can it be youre all Jewish today?
Just so you could throw Christmas away?
Glory to God, oh your God and mine
Or if you have no God, glory to well, whatever you have.
IV
Me, Im happy to have a politically correct Christmas
Ill even join in the anti-Christian spirit
My Christmas tree is homosexual
And if I have hot cross buns at Easter
Ill somehow hide the crosses.
I wont give gold jewellery, incense sticks or cannabis
In case anyone picks up on any relevance
But please, I beg you, give us this chance
This annual excuse for some song, some dance
Laughter, and
Lights
(So I dont offend the aliens)
Let us keep a little culture
Just to stop us devolving
Back to Homo sapiens.
( Meghan McAvoy, December 2005)
Copyright ©
ladyaryssa
... [
2004-12-13 16:47:37]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: My Christmas Tree is Homosexual
(User Rating: 1 )
by LEMMEN on
Monday, 13th December 2004 @ 08:42:04 PM AEST
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a Message)
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OK WOW!!! Points well said.
~DENNIS~ |
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Re: My Christmas Tree is Homosexual
(User Rating: 1 )
by shelby on
Monday, 13th December 2004 @ 08:48:06 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| you tell em I love this ! |
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Re: My Christmas Tree is Homosexual
(User Rating: 1 )
by ladyaryssa on
Tuesday, 14th December 2004 @ 11:57:35 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| Thanks for the thoroughly positive crit... Can future criticism be a bit more specific though? like if there was any particular bit that you liked, what, and why do you think that was? |
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Re: My Christmas Tree is Homosexual
(User Rating: 1 )
by sweettalkingwoman on
Tuesday, 28th December 2004 @ 11:45:24 AM AEST
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a Message)
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what crap!
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Re: My Christmas Tree is Homosexual
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Saturday, 31st December 2005 @ 09:23:02 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| The subject certainly needs to be written about... after reading this ( and 8 hours later) ... it still needs to be written about. |
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