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Into The Dark
Contributed by
redtempest13
on
Tuesday, 14th December 2004 @ 07:26:13 PM in AEST
Topic:
Suicide
|
Dizzying darkness,
Tumbling down,
No air to breath,
No place to stand,
I'm all alone,
Totally forgotten,
Lifeless corpses,
Lining the wall,
Reaching out,
With decayed hands,
To try to snatch,
To try to grab,
To trap me in their web,
Sadness thickens,
Clouding my brain,
I can't think,
I can't breath,
I can't scream,
I hate the dark,
The monsters in my mind,
Clawing at my thoughts,
Wrecking my emotions,
Eating at my safety,
Dragging me under,
Pulling me down,
Down into the dark,
Into death,
There is no love,
Only hate to surround,
This prison I'm in,
My life is cold,
Freezing my heart,
Heating my fury,
I hate my life,
I hate myself,
I want to die,
I want to live,
I want to run,
I want to stay,
I want to hide,
I want to cower,
But I can't,
I am no one,
I don't matter,
I am invisible,
I am light,
I am dark,
I am life,
I am death,
I'm not loved,
I cry my tears,
My heart is broken,
Cracked in pieces,
Never to be fixed,
HE did this,
Killed my soul,
Tore my emotions,
So I'll succumb,
I'll drink HIS poison,
HE's ruined my chances,
For love or tender caring,
So tonight I go in silence,
On Death's cloud to drift . . . Goodbye.
Copyright ©
redtempest13
... [
2004-12-14 19:26:13]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Into The Dark
(User Rating: 1 )
by wray on
Tuesday, 14th December 2004 @ 07:42:23 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
| Cool lol.. I like how you just lay it all out like that, pure emotion-driven words, which has a heavier impact than cleverly-shaped thought-provoking verses. Most people learn to shy away from this style of writing so it's quite refreshing and easy to relate to, well done. |
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Re: Into The Dark
(User Rating: 1 )
by hoist1atca on
Tuesday, 14th December 2004 @ 08:21:45 PM AEST
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a Message)
|
Very good -
How about one of your good days now-
We must all face the world with the best face we can muster, even if it seems that stuff happens over and over...
Joe |
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Re: Into The Dark
(User Rating: 1 )
by Sapphire_Blue on
Tuesday, 14th December 2004 @ 09:04:34 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
| Excellent write...running through all your emotions like a raging storm...awesome poem. |
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Re: Into The Dark
(User Rating: 1 )
by CasperBlack on
Tuesday, 14th December 2004 @ 10:04:18 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
| Though you're form and word usage are very good, I would suggest serious counceling. Only a mind that was truly deranged, from the apparent loss of love, and implied loss of life would write this peice. But, on the whole, It was a good poem. |
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