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Silent Murderer
Contributed by
CrimsonTears
on
Sunday, 19th December 2004 @ 11:18:48 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
You walk into my room
While I lie peacefully dreaming
You take a knife and carve away
While I lie there silently screaming
What was once ivory
Is now a dark crimson red
No blood left to spare
Youve left me here dead
How long will it take
Before they find me here
How didnt they hear my cries
When theyre lying so very near
I can see the sun rising
Its time for them to wake
Theyll find me soon enough
Their hearts will surely break
I can hear my mother coming
Shes opening the door
As soon as she sees me
She drops down to the floor
My brother walks in my room
And stands there wanting to run
He takes a knife out of my hand
And whispers what have you done?
Copyright ©
CrimsonTears
... [
2004-12-19 23:18:48]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Silent Murderer
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 19th December 2004 @ 11:47:06 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
| Wow...great work. I love the flow of it and the vivid imagery. This is sad but beautiful. Thanks for sharing. |
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Re: Silent Murderer
(User Rating: 1 )
by BEBE on
Sunday, 19th December 2004 @ 11:58:48 PM AEST
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a Message)
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THIS IS GREAT POEM, I LOVE HOW THIS SO GRACEFULLY FLOWS, IF THIS REALLY HAPPENED IM SORRY.
GOD BLESS U |
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Re: Silent Murderer
(User Rating: 1 )
by TaintedSoul on
Monday, 20th December 2004 @ 06:10:18 AM AEST
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a Message)
|
Love the twist there at the end. You set this up as if an invader has entered the home and them BAM! It's one's own self as the suspect.
peace
TS |
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Re: Silent Murderer
(User Rating: 1 )
by killingmehslowly on
Wednesday, 29th December 2004 @ 03:01:15 PM AEST
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a Message)
|
bravo. I like this one alot. It just flows and sounds beautiful not only in my head but spoken aloud. I really liked the twist in the poem too. Very good, very unexpected. Love it.
-Sami- |
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