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no one cares
Contributed by
spirit_of_dark_tears
on
Wednesday, 22nd December 2004 @ 11:53:42 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
No one cares I am the result whats better left unspoken tide down to be broken down I the deep of crimsonstone words can be broken so can bones Cheaply venal, stupidly verbose A slip of the tongue, a slit of the throat Six feet under no one knows all the people 6 feet under in rows filled with hatred foes of dread now all of us are dead light the torch pick up your cross to night dine in the presents of the judge heaven or hell only the sand of time will tell six feet under not a marker not a stone welcome to this crimson stone
Copyright ©
spirit_of_dark_tears
... [
2004-12-22 23:53:42] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: no one cares
(User Rating: 1 ) by wickedlette420 on
Thursday, 23rd December 2004 @ 12:09:21 AM AEST (User
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it's a beautiful poem, and it's extremely different from my style of writing. Absolutely amazing. keep up the good work! |
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Re: no one cares
(User Rating: 1 ) by katyqueen35 on
Thursday, 23rd December 2004 @ 12:10:51 AM AEST (User
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In my opinion it's very sad so sad.
very well express great job. |
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Re: no one cares
(User Rating: 1 ) by Adriean on
Thursday, 23rd December 2004 @ 02:22:33 AM AEST (User
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Conjures images that I have in my own mind, yet have no idea how to express. Good Work |
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Re: no one cares
(User Rating: 1 ) by Stonedraider23 on
Thursday, 23rd December 2004 @ 02:40:43 AM AEST (User
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good write n whateva they said short makes me think but thats cuz im confused |
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Re: no one cares
(User Rating: 1 ) by Jace21 on
Thursday, 23rd December 2004 @ 10:31:30 AM AEST (User
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i hope that this isnt something that will be acted out. You have a true gift inside of you. Ever need anything, please talk to me. |
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Re: no one cares
(User Rating: 1 ) by zenmind on
Thursday, 23rd December 2004 @ 02:18:04 PM AEST (User
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Hey every one, this is my little brother. I'm so glad you're writing poetry, and good poetry at that. Seriously, for your age, you are really good. It makes me proud to be your older brother :)
Check out this line:
No one cares
I am the result what’s better left unspoken
tide down to be broken
That's great. I am the result of what is better left unspoken......yeah.....that's what I'm talking about. Good stuff. It reminds of a line I would write....and probably have written.
Cheaply venal, stupidly verbose
A slip of the tongue, a slit of the throat
Another great line. Poetic, creative. Nice.
Keep writing. You're honestly expressing yourself. It makes me sad though, that you're experiencing a lot of depressing emotions. I understand because I am too. You know, it's hard for me because I am your older brother, and it hurts to see you experiencing the same pain that I am exeriencing. But that's me being the protective older brother. I'd like to think that this pain cannot touch you now, while you are still young. But I'm learning more, every time I talk to you that you are growing up, you aren't a kid anymore. Remember that sadness, pain, those are what makes us human, along with joy and love as well. It's good that you're getting this out, but just remember that "All is full of Love".
Love you bro
Be True,
zenmind |
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