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From Love’s Highest Peak
Contributed by
hoist1atca
on
Monday, 3rd January 2005 @ 05:23:58 PM in AEST
Topic:
LostLove
|
My heart, now only an empty shell-
From love’s highest peak, it has fell-
Left alone, forgotten and cold-
No emotions left for it to hold…
Gone now, the gentle touch of your hand-
That which fed the fire of my hearts demand-
A forgotten pleasure placed upon my skin-
One, which I feel that I may never know again…
Lost now, the sweet taste of your kiss-
A delight which I will forevermore miss-
And likewise the smile that came my way-
When you and I met on that long ago day…
Tears that once fell in endless number-
Now only return within my deepest slumber-
For only in my sleep does your memory return-
Allowing my hearts lost flame once again to burn…
Copyright ©
hoist1atca
... [
2005-01-03 17:23:58]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: From Love’s Highest Peak
(User Rating: 1 )
by autumngreeneyes on
Monday, 3rd January 2005 @ 05:37:07 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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| It bothers me that you used the word fell..when the tense should be fallen.. but I won't complain.. I have a tendency to want everything to be perfect when my own work is far from it.. I see a really good poem like this? I start re-wording and playing with it 'cause it's fun... |
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Re: From Love’s Highest Peak
(User Rating: 1 )
by faffeee on
Monday, 3rd January 2005 @ 06:04:18 PM AEST
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| loved the poem (you can use fell, its poetic liscense - its about the poetry not the grammar) very emotive :) katie xx |
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Re: From Love’s Highest Peak
(User Rating: 1 )
by travisk on
Monday, 3rd January 2005 @ 06:19:36 PM AEST
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a Message)
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feeling that one bud
no problems just smooth emotion within the lines |
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Re: From Love’s Highest Peak
(User Rating: 1 )
by Blu on
Monday, 3rd January 2005 @ 07:15:45 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Very nice. I know all too well what you mean. Creativity isn't something that is bound by the laws of grammar or spelling. Just ask Emily Dickinson (yes, I know she's dead :)~ ). Good write.
Blu |
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