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Submerged
Contributed by
Apolla
on
Saturday, 8th January 2005 @ 08:37:31 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
Despretly I gasp for breath, I see the bubbles rising, Is this what I want? Do I want to end it here? Like this? Thoughts run through my mind endlessly, I think of many things. My friends, family, and lovers, The day to day life I live. I'm getting weaker now, Almost no longer breathing. Then in that moment, I think of what I'm yet to experience, Marriage, birth...... So many things that I'm not promised yet everyone takes forgranted. I forget my sorrows, my wonders, my worries, The water overtakes me with my final breath........
Copyright ©
Apolla
... [
2005-01-08 20:37:31] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Submerged
(User Rating: 1 ) by afterdark on
Saturday, 8th January 2005 @ 08:38:43 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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I think if you do try it..Go for pills or something a bit better..Drowning is such a damn downer hun. |
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Re: Submerged
(User Rating: 1 ) by breny on
Saturday, 8th January 2005 @ 08:41:40 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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i think you realized a little to late that commiting suicide is stupid without experiencing everything life has to give. good poem though |
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Re: Submerged
(User Rating: 1 ) by Artemis03 on
Saturday, 8th January 2005 @ 08:45:28 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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Very creative..very cool. Something new that expresses the"you". I like it...
It kinda gets a girl thinkin'.lol. It's all true..
I quiver with fear...jk Artemis2Apolla ^_^ |
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Re: Submerged
(User Rating: 1 ) by ViktorMorgan on
Saturday, 8th January 2005 @ 09:19:34 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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Very expressive, tantalizing ending. Expresses alot of emotion |
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Re: Submerged
(User Rating: 1 ) by THUGGIN4REAL on
Wednesday, 30th March 2005 @ 03:25:43 PM AEST (User
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i like your poem , and it doesnt matter if people can relate or not , what matters is that your words come from your heart. nicely done |
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Re: Submerged
(User Rating: 1 ) by Whisper on
Friday, 8th April 2005 @ 11:03:26 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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Ahh nice vision words. Excellent choice of words. The reader can almost swallow the bubbles slipping across their lips. Nice write.
Whisper |
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