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Sorry Sweetie

Contributed by O7NeVeS on Tuesday, 11th January 2005 @ 05:01:05 PM in AEST
Topic: goodbyepoetry



Im sorry to say but I have a confession to make
That may undoubtedly put both our hearts at stake
I know I said I would never hurt you
But I think this is a promise I cant pull through
I think we must stop seeing each other
Because I have a feeling someone will blow my cover
If that were to happen my life would be doomed
I just dont need things to get so screwed
Things in my life are just so hectic right now
That I dont want you to hate me nor have a cow
Dont get me wrong I really do like you
And believe you me couldnt wait to taste you
But I really dont think theres anything you can say
To change my mind because my answer wont sway
Blame it all on me, you definitely should
Cuz from the beginning didnt do all I could




Copyright © O7NeVeS ... [ 2005-01-11 17:01:05]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: Sorry Sweetie (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Tuesday, 11th January 2005 @ 05:04:36 PM AEST
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*amused* This is cute, and you have put into poetry here what I'm sure there are thousands of guys wanting to say. :-) You could maybe even make money off of this one, and that's a rare thing. Anyway, nice write! Cheers!


Re: Sorry Sweetie (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Tuesday, 11th January 2005 @ 05:13:13 PM AEST
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I liked this write.
It's hard to say I'm sorry, but you put your feelings together so clearly.
Good job.


Re: Sorry Sweetie (User Rating: 1 )
by Daniela_Maria_Violin on Tuesday, 11th January 2005 @ 05:14:35 PM AEST
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Timebot is right... if a hallmark card was ever made for break-ups in relationships, this would be on it!

Good writing here. *smiles*


Re: Sorry Sweetie (User Rating: 1 )
by O7NeVeS on Tuesday, 11th January 2005 @ 05:32:00 PM AEST
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Thanks guys for ur comments! I thought it was an OK poem but... I dunno! =) TD


Re: Sorry Sweetie (User Rating: 1 )
by breny on Tuesday, 11th January 2005 @ 06:07:18 PM AEST
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wow awsome way to put your feelings in your writting. the structure of the poem is good and i love how sincere it is..good write

*Brenna*


Re: Sorry Sweetie (User Rating: 1 )
by PumpkinPie on Wednesday, 12th January 2005 @ 12:08:01 AM AEST
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I don't know what you did,but I do know you seem to be a very kind hearted person.We all make mistakes and it's really something to be able to say "I'm sorry" and to end things in order not to cause this other person anymore pain.It sounds simple to do,but a lot don't do it,so kudos to you.Great write,
PumpkinPie


Re: Sorry Sweetie (User Rating: 1 )
by mina-1 on Wednesday, 12th January 2005 @ 02:36:33 AM AEST
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wow, i absolutely loved your poem. It's so hard to say sorry, but your words seem very sincere. well written. keep up the fantastic work
cheers,
sue


Re: Sorry Sweetie (User Rating: 1 )
by autumngreeneyes on Saturday, 15th January 2005 @ 01:34:31 PM AEST
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I didn't read this at the best of times..I had a lot of noises going on..parts of the poem confused me.. but it might just have been me.. I'll come read it again when things aren't so hectic..

If that were to happen my life would be doomed
I just don’t need things to get so screwed

I don't see a rhyme here..

You could say something like..(just a suggestion.

if that were to happen, get me exhumed
because I'd be dead, my life is doomed.

then you have a real rhyme.. but again, just a suggestion.. forced rhymes don't bother everyone..
I have a sensitive ear..


Re: Sorry Sweetie (User Rating: 1 )
by Dec2three198five on Sunday, 23rd January 2005 @ 11:39:25 PM AEST
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Who was this? I'm sorry you two didn't work out. 33


Re: Sorry Sweetie (User Rating: 1 )
by CurtisC on Friday, 4th March 2005 @ 01:42:05 AM AEST
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your feelings were poured onto the paper this time, i know this was hard for you..its always hard to let go of someone you care about, there's no getting around that one..nice job tanya :)

Curtis


Re: Sorry Sweetie (User Rating: 1 )
by animusutputo on Thursday, 30th June 2005 @ 10:50:12 AM AEST
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Hmm i really liked this... simple and to the point... I think we've all felt like that at one point... so its easy to relate to...




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