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heart shatter

Contributed by karmen on Wednesday, 19th January 2005 @ 03:41:56 PM in AEST
Topic: LostLove




Pain so deep,
feeling so real.
Afraid of it all,
not willing to heal.

Don’t want to trust anyone,
don’t want to care.
Open my heart again,
I do not dare.

You have all my trust,
you had all my heart,
it was open to you,
from the start.

Told you everything,
I opened up to you.
I’ve never cared for someone so much,
never felt love was true.

You ruined that for me,
feelings of love so grand.
You just stopped talking to me,
I felt like I couldn’t stand.

No goodbye, nothing at all,
no more words were said,
no explanations,
I felt dead.

I thought we were,
meant to be.
Now I can’t stand you,
almost like hate, you see.

You broke my heart,
unlike any other,
you took it, broke it, and kept it,
its going to be hard to love another.

You are my past,
but that's all,
the future is mine,
I will not fall.

I may be hurt,
from this heart shatter,
but its my life,
you no longer matter




Copyright © karmen ... [ 2005-01-19 15:41:56]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: heart shatter (User Rating: 1 )
by Moshi_Moshi on Wednesday, 19th January 2005 @ 04:33:53 PM AEST
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Great job! It really shows how you felt about that person.


Re: heart shatter (User Rating: 1 )
by juliette on Wednesday, 19th January 2005 @ 07:06:50 PM AEST
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Great write!
You will give your heart again, because this is what we do - live to love another day.
Good Luck!
Thanks for sharing!
juliette


Re: heart shatter (User Rating: 1 )
by dragondaughter on Wednesday, 19th January 2005 @ 07:21:49 PM AEST
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Wonderful piece truly...I love the fact that after you heart has been torn asunder you can keep going through life’s thunder...I like that it ended with hope, in other words...

However I would like to make a few minor suggestions that you can ignore or fallow as it pleases you...for they are only suggestions.
"Don’t want to trust anyone," I think this line would be stronger if you took out "anyone" as well as taking out the "again in the following bit.
Also in this line “felt like I couldn’t stand" I think you could drop the "like" and still make it strong...but these are just a thought.

Great piece!


Re: heart shatter (User Rating: 1 )
by deadheadpoet on Wednesday, 19th January 2005 @ 08:33:37 PM AEST
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Well written. I know this pain. I'm sure we all have had our hearts broken a time or two. I almost gave up after two failed marriages(cheaters and alcoholics). After counseling and great friends, I did end up meeting the ONE. I was 35, pretty hateful and a little bitter, and he saved me. I felt like I'd been reborn. Much luck and peace to you.




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