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Not Ready To Love
Contributed by
Dri
on
Thursday, 20th January 2005 @ 03:43:16 PM in AEST
Topic:
LovePoetry
|
I asked if we could talk
like any woman would
and you
with solely masculine dread
had sat
knowing you needed to sit
knowing you needed to let me
pace and fumble with words that
dont sound right under the best of circumstances
and in the end it came out
chopped and diced
for no matter how good of a poet I claim to be
I can never speak to you like I write to people
whos faces I cant see
But it came
"Im too young"
and isnt that the awful truth
no matter how mature
no matter how much I have stood through
how much Ive been made to withstand
I cant pledge my love
because I am, wholly and without apology
young
at least at heart
because in my mind I am still six
and begging for the rain to go away
so I can dance, barefoot on moist ground
and pretend that the world is captivated by me
and love, to me
will always be
the thing that comes after
Ever in the distance
the horizon line
from which I am ever drawing
rows and rows of childish boxes
Copyright ©
Dri
... [
2005-01-20 15:43:16]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Not Ready To Love
(User Rating: 1 )
by Stitch on
Thursday, 20th January 2005 @ 03:55:03 PM AEST
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Wow! I am duly impressed. Whatever your age, your poetry is quite mature. Exchange who's for whose, and you have perfection.
Stitch |
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Re: Not Ready To Love
(User Rating: 1 )
by autumngreeneyes on
Thursday, 20th January 2005 @ 03:56:13 PM AEST
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| This was sooooo great... |
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Re: Not Ready To Love
(User Rating: 1 )
by shelby on
Thursday, 20th January 2005 @ 04:06:35 PM AEST
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a delightful read...... and nomatter the age keep ahold of the laughter and innocence of the child that rests in all of us thats what makes life fun
Michelle |
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Re: Not Ready To Love
(User Rating: 1 )
by zenmind on
Thursday, 20th January 2005 @ 04:07:03 PM AEST
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Good job expressing yourself in this poem. It doesn't matter if you are young. That's great actually. Be grateful. I think sometimes we want to grow up too fast, and then when we are older we try to hold onto the childhood that we have lost. I'm not saying that you are a "child" but don't get too caught up in grasping for what you cannot have, and spend more time enjoying what you do have. Love sucks in that way, sometimes.
because in my mind I am still six
and begging for the rain to go away
so I can dance, barefoot on moist ground
and pretend that the world is captivated by me
and love, to me
will always be
the thing that comes after
Ever in the distance
the horizon line
from which I am ever drawing
rows and rows of childish boxes
I thought this was especially great. The image is strong. I think that it fully expresses what you were trying to say in the poem. I am impressed
Be True,
zenmind |
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Re: Not Ready To Love
(User Rating: 1 )
by freckle on
Thursday, 20th January 2005 @ 04:23:38 PM AEST
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| I loved your poem. It was a good blend of imagery and truth. Kudos to you! : ) |
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Re: Not Ready To Love
(User Rating: 1 )
by n2dep2care on
Thursday, 20th January 2005 @ 05:39:56 PM AEST
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A rare and wonderful find. Beautiful and pointed. Nicely done!
Laurie |
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Re: Not Ready To Love
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 20th January 2005 @ 11:18:57 PM AEST
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| I thought this was excellent. There seems to be some "awful truth" of some kind in most of us. Very expressive! Cheers! |
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Re: Not Ready To Love
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jackee_line on
Friday, 21st January 2005 @ 04:42:26 PM AEST
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| Impressive write, well done |
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