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Father's Touch
Contributed by
Bleeding_Nightmares
on
Monday, 7th February 2005 @ 11:35:16 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
Fathers Touch
Why are my tears so red?
Sticky from sick love's edge
Why do my eyes bleed?
From lies you decreed,
Why do you hurt me?
Tearing me there daddy.
By Bleeding_Nightmares
Copyright ©
Bleeding_Nightmares
... [
2005-02-07 23:35:16]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Father's Touch
(User Rating: 1 )
by breny on
Monday, 7th February 2005 @ 11:39:07 PM AEST
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i'm right there with ya. yea this poem is short but it says more than 100 words would. great write :-D
~Brenna~ |
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Re: Father's Touch
(User Rating: 1 )
by allforyou on
Monday, 7th February 2005 @ 11:40:04 PM AEST
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You're right.....one experienced here...great write, it shows very deep hurt/emotion.
--Kara |
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Re: Father's Touch
(User Rating: 1 )
by blowfish_jane on
Tuesday, 8th February 2005 @ 02:12:41 AM AEST
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what a brilliant write, the flow was awesome and the sadness of it was writen perfectly.
Jane x |
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Re: Father's Touch
(User Rating: 1 )
by Stitch on
Tuesday, 8th February 2005 @ 07:32:07 AM AEST
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Another write full of raw emotions. I think you want an apostrophe on loves in the second line, but that's all I can see. Nice stuff.
Stitch |
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Re: Father's Touch
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jenni_K on
Tuesday, 8th February 2005 @ 09:45:47 AM AEST
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A really touching and heartfelt write. (no pun intended)
Jenni |
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Re: Father's Touch
(User Rating: 1 )
by DeathChild on
Wednesday, 9th February 2005 @ 08:49:58 AM AEST
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Deep...you're one helluve poet.Suddenly I'm glad I got positive criticism from you on one of my poems!
Keep on the work.
-Child |
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Re: Father's Touch
(User Rating: 1 )
by bobotheclown on
Wednesday, 9th February 2005 @ 05:02:16 PM AEST
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wow another great poem you have a talent
with saying a lot in few words. I loved this
poem, but I hope it isn't based on personal
experiences.
Bobo (Joel) |
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Re: Father's Touch
(User Rating: 1 )
by Essentially9 on
Wednesday, 9th February 2005 @ 10:26:23 PM AEST
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| talent can echo with one word, and youve done so with about thirty. |
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Re: Father's Touch
(User Rating: 1 )
by UnlovedChild on
Thursday, 10th February 2005 @ 01:39:34 AM AEST
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| So little words, can say so much. Excellent write. |
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Re: Father's Touch
(User Rating: 1 )
by arden on
Saturday, 12th February 2005 @ 10:51:28 AM AEST
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you write so few words and yet it holds so much.
loved this. great work
Arden |
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