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Broke Mans Anthem
Contributed by
compton-tre-block
on
Wednesday, 9th February 2005 @ 09:19:25 PM in AEST
Topic:
AmericanTragedy
|
THE GHETTO..WOULD BE MUCH BETTER
IF I WASNT BROKE..GOVERNMENT KEEPS
US DOWN FROM COAST TO COAST..NO
MATTER WHERE YOUR AT OR THE COLOR
YOUR FACE..THEY STILL JACK YOU FOR THE
PENNIES YOU SCRAPE..LOOK AT ME..DONT
MAKE ENOUGH BUT I MAKE WHAT I CAN..
IT BARELY FEEDS MY DAUGHTER..DOES
THAT MAKE ME A MAN?? WHERES THE LOVE??
THEY MADE US LIVE IN POVERTY..SHOT MY
BROTHERS DOWN WHY'D THEY LIE TO ME??
EVERYDAY..ITS THE SAME PROBLEMS AS
THE ONES BEFORE..PLANT DOPE ON ME AND
PUT MY FACE TO THE FLOOR.."I DONT WANT
ANY PROBLEMS OFFICER, JUST LEAVE ME
ALONE..AND NO IM NOT A THUG I WAS JUST
GOIN BACK HOME!!" WITH A GLARE I SAW THE
HATE IN HIS EYES..BUSH DONT LOVE US..
HE'S THE DEVIL IN DESCIZE..
Copyright ©
compton-tre-block
... [
2005-02-09 21:19:25]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Broke Mans Anthem
(User Rating: 1 )
by afterdark on
Wednesday, 9th February 2005 @ 09:21:54 PM AEST
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| I will be sure to toss you a dime when I drive by in my Honda Accord |
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Re: Broke Mans Anthem
(User Rating: 1 )
by Essentially9 on
Wednesday, 9th February 2005 @ 09:38:17 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| dont you use capitals for your poems, makes it a bit harder to read. it would be better to format this differently to show your rhyme scheme. good concept, well written of. |
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Re: Broke Mans Anthem
(User Rating: 1 )
by CodyJ on
Wednesday, 9th February 2005 @ 09:41:27 PM AEST
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a Message)
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social commentaries don't need form. Good work man, keep writing and someone will notice. kudos
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Re: Broke Mans Anthem
(User Rating: 1 )
by deadheadpoet on
Wednesday, 9th February 2005 @ 09:49:15 PM AEST
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| Great write. Ignore afterdarks' comments please.(Karma's gonna get him man. You get what you give.) Much peace to you. |
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Re: Broke Mans Anthem
(User Rating: 1 )
by ForeverAlone on
Thursday, 10th February 2005 @ 12:25:08 AM AEST
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Discize....Hmmmm.
Well the caps need to be killed
The scheme needs to be shown better..
I think I'm gaining an enemy and "killer"
If you're scraping pennies then I'll loan you a few out of my piggie bank....
Hmph......
I don't care any more
Whats the point....
So sad...
Clark |
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Re: Broke Mans Anthem
(User Rating: 1 )
by Scarlett on
Wednesday, 23rd February 2005 @ 04:23:05 AM AEST
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i liked this to, better than the other one. i agree with the person who said ignore afterdark, didn't realise he was so cruel. this was powerfully written. i liked the lines:
"DONT MAKE ENOUGH BUT I MAKE WHAT I CAN..
IT BARELY FEEDS MY DAUGHTER..DOES
THAT MAKE ME A MAN??!" |
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Re: Broke Mans Anthem
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 6th March 2005 @ 10:37:42 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| "IF YOU NEED A LITTLE CHANGE,YO I'M PITCHING QUARTERS" |
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