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I tell you
Contributed by
breny
on
Wednesday, 9th February 2005 @ 09:49:13 PM in AEST
Topic:
LovePoetry
|
I tell you that I'm jealous
you say it shows my love
I tell you that i'm scared
so you give a little hug
I tell you that I'm crazy
you know it's just for you
I tell you that I'm weird
you laugh because it's true
I tell you that I love you
and I don't want you to leave
you look at me and smile
and no answer do I need
Copyright ©
breny
... [
2005-02-09 21:49:13]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: I tell you
(User Rating: 1 )
by DorianChambers on
Thursday, 10th February 2005 @ 03:49:04 AM AEST
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a Message)
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" U look at me and smile,
and no answer do i need " love the conclusion, a lovely poem bren . . .
Dorian Chambers |
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Re: I tell you
(User Rating: 1 )
by Silent-No-More on
Monday, 14th February 2005 @ 11:42:09 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Oh, I agree - nice conclusion! Nice flow and use of near rhyme as well. AND... it's sooo sweet : )
Nice work, breny-
~SNM~ |
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Re: I tell you
(User Rating: 1 )
by fielding88 on
Friday, 18th February 2005 @ 08:16:21 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| Nice write, with a lotta meaning behind what u say. this kinda reminds me of all my more recent stuff cuz i use a sense of continuity too, and i like the way ur poem just kinda flowed here. that last stanza was the most powerful though, and it was a really good wat to finish the poem. nice work Brenna! :) |
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Re: I tell you
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 15th March 2005 @ 02:12:46 PM AEST
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| OH! Clever!!! I like this...short, yet worded so well!!! |
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Re: I tell you
(User Rating: 1 )
by freckle on
Friday, 18th March 2005 @ 06:42:58 PM AEST
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Breny, ,this is a great poem. Cute too!
Carol |
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Re: I tell you
(User Rating: 1 )
by i_heart_herby on
Tuesday, 31st May 2005 @ 03:54:59 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| This was a totally sweet poem! |
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