|
 Menu
|
|
|
|
|
Social
|
|
|
|
|
a friends valentine
Contributed by
jamiry
on
Saturday, 12th February 2005 @ 06:43:03 PM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
You have been done wrong its really hard to explain
That boy must have been insane!
My best friend is what you are
Something it seems could have been wished upon a star
Sometimes it feels that we should be
Sometimes I wish that you could see
I have showed you my feelings once before
Uncomfortable around me is what you were
Now it seems everything is fine
As a friend today will you be my valentine
Copyright ©
jamiry
... [
2005-02-12 18:43:03]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
Advertisments:
|
|
|
|
|
|
Sorry, comments are no longer allowed for anonymous, please register for a free membership to access this feature and more
|
|
All comments are owned by the poster. Your Poetry
Dot Com is not responsible for the content of any
comment.
That said, if you find an offensive comment, please
contact via the FeedBack Form with details, including poem title
etc.
|
|
|
Re: a friends valentine
(User Rating: 1 )
by DragonLuvSong on
Sunday, 13th February 2005 @ 01:14:33 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| its very cute. but some things if you want constructive criticism: the second to last couplet doesn't rhyme, so it kinda throws the whole thing off. and just a question: did you rework your syntax just so that the poem would rhyme? |
|
|
|
· 
Poetry
Community
Members
Areas
Reference
Search
Top
Others
