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This Time
Contributed by
justjonesy
on
Thursday, 24th February 2005 @ 03:10:29 PM in AEST
Topic:
LovePoetry
|
I broke off a piece of the heart she once sold me
she shrugged her shoulders, took it then told me
" it looks uneven and a little bit rough,
....but I guess its real enough."
So I showed her a sky where our stars once bled
she closed her eyes, smiled then said
" it looks a bit distant and a little too bright,
....but I guess its real tonight."
Then I gave her the sun, and all the light I could bring
she looked up in my eyes, but didnt say a thing
In silence the whole world seemed to unwind
...so maybe its real this time
Copyright ©
justjonesy
... [
2005-02-24 15:10:29]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: This Time
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Saturday, 5th March 2005 @ 03:32:12 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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This is so beautifully written. I love it! The imagery is so great, and the rhyming is perfect. Awesome work.
Thanks for sharing! |
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Re: This Time
(User Rating: 1 )
by girltranscended on
Monday, 11th April 2005 @ 11:33:24 PM AEST
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a Message)
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How can you even have started this by saying NOT romantic!
* In the kindest nicest nudgiest way says : Hello!
This was amazing! And my favorite line is right here:
"she shrugged her shoulders, took it then told me" it sets quite a mood as do you (giving her everything) and I like a lady with gusto.
:) |
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