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shrinking down...
Contributed by
Blue
on
Monday, 7th March 2005 @ 11:40:11 PM in AEST
Topic:
selfstruggles
|
i am the incredible shrinking girl.
watch me
as i
go from being a full fledged
human being
to one-sixteenth of a personality
a soul
a mind
a person
come see me disappear into the woodwork
like a chameleon
i'm trying my hardest
to blend in with my surroundings
another subtle dig at my character
another stab to the ribs
another slice
another cut
another bruise
another day
what's the point in being special
all it gets you is nowhere
under the operating table
as the sharp tongued scalpel cuts
i'll be cut down bit by bit
watch me shrink
to nothing
it's amazing
Copyright ©
Blue
... [
2005-03-07 23:40:11]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: shrinking down...
(User Rating: 1 )
by girltranscended on
Tuesday, 8th March 2005 @ 12:18:50 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
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Your first line is strong and sets an interesting tone.
Maybe carry the woodwork through the poem or the operating table. Also,
"what's the point in being special
all it gets you is nowhere"
Somethin' doesn't flow right to me here.
Regardless, I really like it! |
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