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a wheel
Contributed by
electrique_poet
on
Tuesday, 15th March 2005 @ 05:40:12 PM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
a wheel is able to roll uphill if you know to do it right in the capacity of the ingenious fool
entering a new epoch this must be about scene 42 (though who knows? knows i; dont keep a tally; i estimate
that in i dont keep track (ive never been good with numbers)
and though; i know it appears theres a hundred years entangled amongst your eyelashes (and im sorry for that) but arent you glad you have them? (otherwise youd be rightfully blind with every moment)
and i must say (i must answer myself) yes; is an eternity observeable from the point of now to never
(and how about a no? oh how that fickle little boy dances)
i am; yes (always as an uncertainty as i am reluctance(ant to a workers fault; a wheel rolling uphill
Copyright ©
electrique_poet
... [
2005-03-15 17:40:12] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: a wheel
(User Rating: 1 ) by ForeverAndADay on
Tuesday, 15th March 2005 @ 05:47:27 PM AEST (User
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Wow. That was good. I liked the jumble and confusion of your words, it made the poem quite artistic. I also loved your verses, they were quite lovely. |
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Re: a wheel
(User Rating: 1 ) by zenmind on
Monday, 28th March 2005 @ 04:39:20 PM AEST (User
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I really liked this poem. A quality of truth came through, and I loved the words.
and though; i know it appears theres a
hundred years entangled amongst your
eyelashes (and im sorry for that) but
arent you glad you have them?
(otherwise youd be rightfully blind
with every moment)
I also think the word "lovely" is quite appropriate for this poem and especially for this verse. This part is heart felt.
and i must say (i must answer
myself) yes;
is an eternity
observeable from the point of now to
never
(and how about a no? oh how that fickle little boy dances)
i am; yes (always
as an uncertainty as i am
reluctance(ant
to a workers fault;
a wheel rolling uphill
This is where the feeling of truth came through for me. You do well in expressing the unexpressable, in words that seem to contradict, yet don't. Life is a paradox, and so is this. I like the confusion, the uncertainty, because strangely enough, it comes across very sure and certain. That's the contradiction I'm talking about. "a wheel rolling uphill"-----such a great image, it encompasses all that I've tried to say.
Be True,
zenmind |
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Re: a wheel
(User Rating: 1 ) by Bianca on
Saturday, 16th April 2005 @ 11:14:44 AM AEST (User
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this is one of your best, i think. |
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