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Sensibly insane
Contributed by
lostinmyself
on
Tuesday, 29th March 2005 @ 11:42:00 AM in AEST
Topic:
toughstuff
|
Paranoid Disillusion,
Plays kiss chase with Anger
While Sensibility looks on;
'I will not cry, I will not cry, I can not cry'
Echoing hollow from between thin lips,
As she rocks upon a rocking chair,
Purchased by Imagination...
And she stares,
At the wall which the stars,
Continuously fall through;
Listening for their shrieks of pain,
Interrupted only by Insecurity's
Continuous chatter in her ear,
And his laughter as he trips Dreams.
And she watches,
With Fascination, as they fall,
Fighting, but sinking,
Drowning in the tears on the floor,
Little arms flailing helplessly,
Hope trying desperately to catch one,
But not strong enough to hold on...
And she cries shattered promises;
Drowning Dreams, flooding Memories,
As she ponders, and realizes,
Maybe sensible is not the way to be,
And fighting herself, she falls,
Nails digging at herself,
Striving to be almost Reckless.
..But she knows,
While she attacks, and rocks,
That as Anger dances around,
Imagination cleans up the mess,
Dreams die, and Hope grieves,
That she is sensible..
...Sensible(y) insane.)
And this is where she belongs...
Copyright ©
lostinmyself
... [
2005-03-29 11:42:00]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Sensibly insane
(User Rating: 1 )
by Nazmythian on
Tuesday, 29th March 2005 @ 11:50:45 AM AEST
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Long ? Are you kidding me ? Have you read summa my stuff ? ( lol, knowing you have )
Phil there is much here that is visually stunning ... the opening line, the whole whole first stanza ... I love the Rocking chair purchased by imagination ... I have seen that.
I could go on and on ... this is definately a new favorite and one that I will return to often.
Nazzy ~ |
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Re: Sensibly insane
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 29th March 2005 @ 12:54:08 PM AEST
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This is... breathtaking. I seriously don't know what to say, I haven't read one like this for a very long time and its a shame, because this is outstanding. My favourite line would have to be
"And she cries shattered promises." that is just... wow... lol.
Stunning, thought-provoking and simply wonderful. A fascinating read. It's captivating from the first line to the last, flows smoothly and is written to a perfection that I couldn't even hope of accomplishing. Beautiful.
Take care
- Becca |
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Re: Sensibly insane
(User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on
Tuesday, 29th March 2005 @ 01:05:03 PM AEST
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Wow and Wow................... your title drew me in and your picture is perfect..... but the poem........ its like you touch the far inner recesses of eveyones mind, an amazing write, this is beautiful!!!!!!!!
hugs n' love nessa
@->>->:- |
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Re: Sensibly insane
(User Rating: 1 )
by Overstated on
Tuesday, 29th March 2005 @ 01:11:20 PM AEST
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| wow just read this poem 3 times - i think i may need to go back and read it so more - i'm drawn in by the almost gothic writting style in this piece... superbly done! |
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Re: Sensibly insane
(User Rating: 1 )
by breny on
Tuesday, 29th March 2005 @ 01:51:21 PM AEST
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I read this poem a couple of times before I felt that I needed to comment on it. This is soooo good! I honestly have never read anything like it which makes it completly unique to me! Unique writes are so interesting and I can sit for hours reading them over and over again each time getting a different meaning out of it. Anyways I really like this :-)
Great Write Phil!
~Brenna~ |
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Re: Sensibly insane
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 29th March 2005 @ 02:06:16 PM AEST
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Oh my - this was stunning! I think you did a tremendous creative job. It was captivating and lyrical and original. I loved this :
And she cries shattered promises;
Drowning Dreams, flooding Memories,
As she ponders, and realizes,
Maybe sensible is not the way to be,
And fighting herself, she falls,
Nails digging at herself,
Striving to be almost Reckless.
terrific.
mj
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Re: Sensibly insane
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 29th March 2005 @ 02:45:38 PM AEST
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HOLY %#@*!
Philly!!!! Where did you come up with this!!!!!!
I am in awe!!! This is by far the BEST thing you have ever written!! I've always mentioned how you seem to grow with each write. This just takes my breath away! |
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Re: Sensibly insane
(User Rating: 1 )
by mina-1 on
Tuesday, 29th March 2005 @ 04:58:40 PM AEST
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Wow Phil this is awesome I have 3 words for this
1. Divine
2. Flawless
3. Superb
Another great write to add to the reat of ur brillant work. Well done
Hugs,
Sue |
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Re: Sensibly insane
(User Rating: 1 )
by neveryours on
Tuesday, 29th March 2005 @ 05:31:07 PM AEST
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O.K. This was good. I will say outright that the little arms really creeped me out, and made me think of drowning babies, but I could just be warped (entirely possible)
The poem was imaginative and interesting, but a little bit unpolished, I think you could shape up a few parts to hlep the flow, and I think it is worth doing because it was a nice piece.
NY |
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Re: Sensibly insane
(User Rating: 1 )
by UnlovedChild on
Tuesday, 29th March 2005 @ 08:51:21 PM AEST
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| This was a strong, emotional and amazing poem. Great job. |
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Re: Sensibly insane
(User Rating: 1 )
by Vampirequeen on
Wednesday, 30th March 2005 @ 01:42:27 AM AEST
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Holy cow.Philly this piece rocks.
The more i read your writes the more i think it couldn't get any better and i was wrong everytime.Awsome awsome job on this piece. |
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Re: Sensibly insane
(User Rating: 1 )
by Willofree on
Wednesday, 30th March 2005 @ 12:42:02 PM AEST
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Wow! This is an awesome poem. A poem like this ought to be published in some prestiegeous journal. When I read a poem that is this good I feel very humbled. This certainly must be an inspired write, especially when this is not your usual style.
The way the poem is structured and how it elicits emotion is wonderful.
A great write, certainly one to be proud of....
Thanks for sharing this masterpiece!
Willofree |
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Re: Sensibly insane
(User Rating: 1 )
by Fionndruinne on
Tuesday, 5th April 2005 @ 07:03:41 PM AEST
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Wow, Phil.
As others have said... your expression keeps getting better and better. This was very intense. And very, very good. Well done!
Blessings.
Andrew |
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Re: Sensibly insane
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 4th May 2005 @ 04:59:30 PM AEST
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| D*** Philly, I think you're right - we're more alike than different. At least I believe that after reading this; we must handle things similarly. As to the poem, I relate to it on so many inner levels I can't even begin to explain. And that is what I think about "Sensibly insane." *hugs* J. |
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