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Homeland
Contributed by
fionndruinne
on
Tuesday, 5th April 2005 @ 04:13:37 PM in AEST
Topic:
spiritual
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that they would walk in the Light And the banner of peace be over them Not stumbling on hard roads But fulfilling the foundations of destiny Spoken before time
It is a wide and dry land Sun-baked in summer A wilderness of souls As far as the eye can see And the remnants of Faith Mark the street-corners: Can you hear the bells Of the missions, tolling, See the padres of old Hear their prayers echo In adobe chambers I would like to have their words Written in my notebook To ponder upon When the sun has gone down.
That they would pursue right paths Not chasing after emptiness But heeding the call of the Spirit Each eye learning to shine
In the shade of an old wall The pathway passes. Have you ever seen a face That was turned away A countenance hidden Even as it faced you The spirit screened Behind its own wall? Have you ever walked In a forest of such faces And felt adrift In a rising sea-swell Somewhere far westward Of the blue bay Where the wooden ships And adventurous hearts Landed in the old days?
That they would walk together That harmony would prove powerful The ageless fears of every heart Be uncovered and forgotten In the ancient dream of the City
Did you notice the place Where my old home stood? Each day of childhood Passed in the midst of all this, Joining the sound of humanity As it echoes to heaven (What does it sound like?) Only those old hills Have any memory Of the vast history That soaks every land Like rain, meant for human hearts, Watering the roots of destiny. Did you know this? Maybe the reason why I spent so many hours Among those hills
That they would embrace each day Knowing that dawn is an excellent thing And learn to love Life With what love the untaught heart Does not know to feel
I wonder how many guises Are the common cloaks of grief And how many words Are used to rework What was edification, Albeit hard to bear, To those first pioneers. Could their testimonies Provide answers to us? For it was only after journey That my eyes recognized What was around me to begin with. It is sad that the clouds No longer call us to wander After what we seek Once we know how to seek it.
That they might awake from slumber And hear the call of Heaven To take up ancient armor And fight the Good Fight - That they might pursue Until they reach the knowledge of Light That is everywhere around them
MMV ADL
Copyright ©
fionndruinne
... [
2005-04-05 16:13:37] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Homeland
(User Rating: 1 ) by lostinmyself on
Tuesday, 5th April 2005 @ 04:19:04 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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There are so many lines in this that stood out to me, Andrew, that it would be extremely hard for me to list them all.
"It is sad that the clouds
No longer call us to wander
After what we seek
Once we know how to seek it."
You know... I was sorta wondering if you wanted me to stop breathing, because this poem almost did, just that.
Great write my friend,
Phil |
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Re: Homeland
(User Rating: 1 ) by blowfish_jane on
Tuesday, 5th April 2005 @ 04:48:37 PM AEST (User
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Andrew this was just totally breathtaking, a well composed artwork.
Did you notice the place
Where my old home stood?
Each day of childhood
Passed in the midst of all this,
Love that part in the poem, thanks for sharing.
Jane^_^ |
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Re: Homeland
(User Rating: 1 ) by Overstated on
Tuesday, 5th April 2005 @ 05:45:20 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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wow! good stuff! well impressed mainly because this piece felt orginal which is quite hard to portray in this day in age!
loved lines like 'It is sad that the clouds
No longer call us to wander
After what we seek
Once we know how to seek it.' profoiundly intelligent thought provoking piece
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Re: Homeland
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 6th April 2005 @ 07:19:16 AM AEST (User
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Well crafted, original and held this reader throughout!
Amazing Andrew!!
It has such a feeling of....honor...to it.
Again amazing! |
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Re: Homeland
(User Rating: 1 ) by fielding88 on
Friday, 8th April 2005 @ 06:30:04 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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I'm trying my best to pick out some of my favorite parts of this outstanding write, but i think some of your best lines (to me, anyways) were:
Only those old hills
Have any memory
Of the vast history
That soaks every land
and mostly:
It is sad that the clouds
No longer call us to wander
After what we seek
Once we know how to seek it.
That last one especially calls to me because I can just so easily relate to it. However, you so strongly depicted so many different scenes all tying beautifully together in my head. I didn't even realize how long this write was until i was looking for those above quotes to be honest :P I was just that hooked. It's a subject that I've never seen dealt with in such a unique way. There's some sort of...aura around your poem (for lack of a better word) and it was truly brilliant. It's a shame there's no melody to go with it, lol but I'm kind of scared to hear it, only because it might not go with the one im my head :P Excellent write nonetheless. |
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Re: Homeland
(User Rating: 1 ) by Kie on
Saturday, 9th April 2005 @ 02:42:46 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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I don't think this needs to be altered in any way.
Sometimes what I think I see is what isn't said. So I like everyone else interpret a different way.
I have an enormous love of history and of antiques or personal items that belonged to someone else. I view that person, their moment and I question what it is that I do know.
This is a beautiful write.
Kie |
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Re: Homeland
(User Rating: 1 ) by faith_my_eyes on
Saturday, 9th April 2005 @ 07:00:13 PM AEST (User
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What a beautiful description Andrew of your birthplace. You make me long for those hills again. You seem to find this poem abstract for yourself, but then something about this poem rings true, close to my heart, for it was in your hometown I heeded my spiritual call and yielded myself as a living sacrifice to Christ. I find this beautiful. Thank you. |
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Re: Homeland
(User Rating: 1 ) by reflections on
Friday, 15th April 2005 @ 08:43:22 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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I am honestly IMPRESSED! This is as good a write as I’ve ever had the pleasure of reading. That covers poetry sites, magazines, or published authors.
You mix a story tellers gift of expression, with a traveler’s bevy of interesting scenes, beautifully tied together with a delightfully original way of capturing the readers attention and mind. You very quickly trap your reading audience by selectively giving small portions of a much larger picture, until (regardless of the piece’s length) it is imperative the reader stay ‘till the end in order to savor the completeness of a master writers offering.
I will return often to read that which you present so very well. Kudos!
Cheers
John
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Re: Homeland
(User Rating: 1 ) by bobotheclown on
Sunday, 17th April 2005 @ 09:04:19 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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I absolutely loved this Andrew I thought this
was a powerful call to unity by someone who
hungers after God. I am not really sure what
to say because it hit me so hard to not hide
in my depression, but instead reach out to
other with love... that's what I got out of it and I
think that is what you were trying to say. I am
sorry if I got this wrong, but I loved this poem.
Bobo (Joel) |
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Re: Homeland
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Thursday, 21st April 2005 @ 04:23:03 AM AEST (User
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You know reading this i started to feel nostalgic for something I've never experienced. I was with you all the way in this piece, you have a great talent for drawing the reader in. Awesome.
Johnny. |
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Re: Homeland
(User Rating: 1 ) by Nazmythian on
Saturday, 23rd April 2005 @ 05:39:41 AM AEST (User
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It will not take any alteration Andrew because it is complete. It has said exactly what needed to be. It is ... breathtaking. You shine here ... brightly. The writes I enjoy the most are those that flow from within and make me search to find thier meaning. I am pleased this happens to others as well and it could not have happened to you in a more intriguing and beautiful way. Fortune shines on you my friend ... the answers will reveal themselves when they are ready.
Nazzy ~ |
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Re: Homeland
(User Rating: 1 ) by Wachumiri on
Monday, 2nd May 2005 @ 11:14:57 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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Yes, yes, very good. I especially liked this one. I'm still hungry, though.
David |
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Re: Homeland
(User Rating: 1 ) by Tanmaya on
Wednesday, 11th May 2005 @ 07:44:18 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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I found this to be a very powerful write. Haven't been on ypdc lately, but glad to have come back and read this.
This is one of the lines, I found very profound-
For it was only after journey
That my eyes recognized
What was around me to begin with.
Actually, the whole poem is very profound. It's great to read such work that goes beyond the words... and reveals depth of mind and soul...
Magnificent!
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Re: Homeland
(User Rating: 1 ) by Archie on
Saturday, 3rd September 2005 @ 11:49:31 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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This took me on a journey and at the end of it I realized I am where I am supposed to be. Thanks. |
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Re: Homeland
(User Rating: 1 ) by inlovewithaladd on
Thursday, 21st June 2007 @ 09:44:39 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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I liked this. |
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