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Outside of a Door
Contributed by
Pocket
on
Monday, 11th April 2005 @ 07:02:06 PM in AEST
Topic:
LovePoetry
|
Me, my heart was given easily
But faster still it was broken
And I'm crying now
On my bedroom floor
Without an appetite
Because the world was ended
Outside of my door
He, his hand was there to hold me
But kinder still was his smile
And I'm laughing now
On his bedroom floor
Without a stomach ache
Didn't care what is shrieking
Outside of his door
*Chorus* Truth be told I knew it all along
That the light gleaming around you
Was to lighten my night
At first I shielded my eyes
It was too bright to take
Now I let flames
Dance inside my eyes
As you shade the glare of life
We, we were teaching each other
But learning still was coming
And we're kissing now
On our bedroom floor
Without that emptiness
Though the world is dying
Outside of our door
*Chorus*
Copyright ©
Pocket
... [
2005-04-11 19:02:06]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Outside of a Door
(User Rating: 1 )
by JacobsKK on
Monday, 11th April 2005 @ 07:12:05 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| Wow, do you know what I like about this song? It's unique. Most people would say, "Oh, its not a song if it doesn't rhyme" but you have prooved them all wrong with this wrote. You were able to write a song that doen't rhyme but that is equally beautiful. Good for you, that was fantastic. :-) |
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Re: Outside of a Door
(User Rating: 1 )
by chazthepoet on
Wednesday, 24th August 2005 @ 05:24:14 AM AEST
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a Message)
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great write
keep it up
you've got a nack for lyrical writing even without the rhyme. |
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Re: Outside of a Door
(User Rating: 1 )
by Archie on
Sunday, 28th August 2005 @ 07:32:22 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| Your poem has many lessons in it for the person looking to fall in love, they are learned from the pain of what is lost in a love that is not true. I like this poem a lot. |
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