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my thoughts on thoughts
Contributed by
In_a_While
on
Thursday, 21st April 2005 @ 03:29:46 PM in AEST
Topic:
EmotionalPoetry
|
here i am God
my love isn't all gone
i try to be strong tall
there's nothing but hate's wall
so here i stand mom
my hand in my head gone
all that is left here
is all that's my worst fear
so here i fall dad
my seasons have made sad
i tried to be stong tree
but something has wronged me...
then....i go cold...
here i stand on broken glass
fearing failures of my past
shine your light in the darkened sea
shadows of you, cellars of me...
Copyright ©
In_a_While
... [
2005-04-21 15:29:46]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: my thoughts on thoughts
(User Rating: 1 )
by Onslaught on
Thursday, 21st April 2005 @ 03:35:07 PM AEST
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a Message)
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that was good. I liked the style, the flow.
It was sad, but it was well written. good job |
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Re: my thoughts on thoughts
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 21st April 2005 @ 08:02:53 PM AEST
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I have to say, I love the title, was creative, as the whole poem was. the minor repitition and rhythem of the poem was well done too. nice job.
klia
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