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Dancing Beneath The First Storm Of The Year
Contributed by
liquidsunshine
on
Sunday, 22nd May 2005 @ 06:37:53 PM in AEST
Topic:
happypoetry
|
A pink flash of lightning
Beyond the wet pane
The pavement is livid--
It moves with the rain
Faint hint of blackberry
Strong tincture of sweetpea
As my hand's on the lock
I feel you here with me
A timpany rumble
A rumbling delight
I twirl in bare feet
Those same feet become light
But my spirits feel solid
I'm heavily real
Opaque-- and I'm smiling
A reeling pinwheel
The drops belt down brightly
Their wet melts my hair
They spatter my shirt
And the skin that I wear
The only thing better
Would put you right here
Dancing beneath
The first storm of the year
Copyright ©
liquidsunshine
... [
2005-05-22 18:37:53]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Dancing Beneath The First Storm Of The Year
(User Rating: 1 )
by CodyJ on
Sunday, 22nd May 2005 @ 08:22:49 PM AEST
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| love the imagery. what does timpany mean? kudos |
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Re: Dancing Beneath The First Storm Of The Year
(User Rating: 1 )
by Dralion on
Sunday, 22nd May 2005 @ 08:35:15 PM AEST
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You don't often find someone who can find delight in a storm.
But all rain is--is-- well--Liquid Sunshine:) |
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Re: Dancing Beneath The First Storm Of The Year
(User Rating: 1 )
by blowfish_jane on
Monday, 23rd May 2005 @ 04:03:02 AM AEST
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Your use of words is wonderful in this Chels. I love the imagery this is giving me.
It's just outstanding, well done.
Jane xxx |
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Re: Dancing Beneath The First Storm Of The Year
(User Rating: 1 )
by hauntedscorp on
Sunday, 31st July 2005 @ 07:04:32 AM AEST
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Lovely and perhaps I'm being a tad biased because of my own fondness for dancing in thunderstorms: ) I think you did quite well with this piece. You captured that alive feeling that only a beautiful rainstorm can provide, and your use of imagery is wonderful...Creating sights and sounds for the reader so real they get caught up in your words...It had a very fluid flow throughout as well. A most enjoyable read!
Scorp.
(Wishes it was raining now) |
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Re: Dancing Beneath The First Storm Of The Year
(User Rating: 1 )
by Wachumiri on
Friday, 12th August 2005 @ 02:00:24 AM AEST
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Rain overpowers like no other. To feel the raindrops falling as I run (I can´t dance) through the rain. It heals the soul in a way I´ll never understand.
Take care, and may many rainshowers find you.
David |
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