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rewind time, how i wish i could
Contributed by
brokenwings
on
Friday, 27th May 2005 @ 09:52:41 PM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
You are the one I shall forever cherish
a devotion that shall never perish
yet saddly this liaison must come to an end
how this juliet will miss her romeo
affair of the heart that began as friends
the tenderness must now go
there is no regret
and I'll never forget
as i slip into utter desolation
I acrry with me memories of compassion
and with agony of mind
i wish to rewind
to the first day I met you
and start then with a simple
one day I will love you
and that you'll never know
because it will never be said
so draw me close
press your chest into mine
look tenderly into these eyes
and tell me what it is you see
and know this you will one day love me
forbidden love it may even be
but love for sure..
Copyright ©
brokenwings
... [
2005-05-27 21:52:41]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: rewind time, how i wish i could
(User Rating: 1 )
by hauntedscorp on
Friday, 27th May 2005 @ 10:51:43 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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This is a pretty good, but sad tale...The style a little off though, rhyming one line, then not...Also a couple spelling errors you may want to look out for next time...lol 'acrry' I actually thought this was some funky English word I didn't know, until I realized it was supposed to be 'carry'....hehe I think the premise was good though, and with practice you'll pull of better...
Scorp. |
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Re: rewind time, how i wish i could
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Friday, 27th May 2005 @ 11:14:46 PM AEST
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a Message)
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A masterpeice!
Very moving, strong, tender inticing write.
huggs,
emy |
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