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Beaten
Contributed by
failariel_ancalime
on
Friday, 3rd June 2005 @ 01:01:34 AM in AEST
Topic:
toughstuff
|
One mighty punch,
Blood comes running down.
Coloring my face,
Even my white gown.
One swift kick,
Never like before.
Legs becoming numb,
Bruises kicked to the core.
One long scratch,
Slowly cutting open.
I can't take much more of this.
What will I do then?
I cannot just run away.
They will hurt me worse.
Someone come, take me away.
Sace me from this curse.
So many tears.
So much bleeding.
So much hate.
Not much healing.
No one knows what it's like.
No one can even guess.
Being hit and kicked so many times,
At least it will leave one scratch less.
Copyright ©
failariel_ancalime
... [
2005-06-03 01:01:34]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Beaten
(User Rating: 1 )
by heartquake on
Friday, 3rd June 2005 @ 01:18:38 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| the second to last stanza was the most powerful, which in most cases would mean it should be last but you made it so it would set up the last stanza... and you did it very well... good job |
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Re: Beaten
(User Rating: 1 )
by blue_angel on
Friday, 3rd June 2005 @ 09:07:14 AM AEST
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wow... are you rilly beaten like this or is this just metaphorical talk? if it is the first, i am so sorry. i know what its like... rilly i do... its terrible. i hope you can get some help...
sending hope and love,
jennie* xXx |
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Re: Beaten
(User Rating: 1 )
by Fears on
Friday, 3rd June 2005 @ 04:39:33 PM AEST
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wow. that was verry p0werfu11! I have to ask the same question as blue_angel...is this write about the emotions that you experience or just something that inspired you?
~Fears |
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Re: Beaten
(User Rating: 1 )
by blue_angel on
Saturday, 4th June 2005 @ 11:16:28 AM AEST
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this is so sad and very powerful...does this actually happen to u? i no its none of my business but they way u wrote it seems so real...i am here if u ever need to talk ( i know who would talk to a complete stranger right, but unno just in case)
concernd
kc |
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Re: Beaten
(User Rating: 1 )
by spazz911 on
Saturday, 4th June 2005 @ 11:20:37 AM AEST
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omg im so sry, that last (2nd) comment under blue_angel is actually mine, she was over at my house and there was some mix up of wat account we were on so...yea that was my question and that was my comment
kc |
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