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burning out bright
Contributed by
feathercut
on
Friday, 10th June 2005 @ 09:46:20 PM in AEST
Topic:
Lifepoems
|
fingers stream through the sky
the morning stepping through
lights coming fast
Breathe
signals, recieve
drive me to the sea
into the wind
ill crash eternally
in come the grey
streetlights greet
before the rising of the day
looking through, the city's life unknown
we have come baring our eyes
through sight life brings its own
lost at last we are at fire speed
burning though the sky
bodys stealing time
you and me my friend
all is gone but us
pretend
this chariot
will sail us
to the end
Copyright ©
feathercut
... [
2005-06-10 21:46:20]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: burning out bright
(User Rating: 1 )
by freckle on
Wednesday, 4th January 2006 @ 10:55:50 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
I found your poem just a little hard to understand. I really enjoyed the final verse though. I don't know if my confusion was because of the way your structured the poem or maybe punctuation.
Overall, I enjoyed the imagery you expressed and thought it was a decent poem. Thank you for sharing it!
Carol |
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Re: burning out bright
(User Rating: 1 )
by tres_estrellas on
Monday, 9th January 2006 @ 06:12:07 AM AEST
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a Message)
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yeah, I lived it very much. I could definatly understand it. I've felt what you were trying to describe before.
very nice. Keep it up! |
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Re: burning out bright
(User Rating: 1 )
by tres_estrellas on
Monday, 9th January 2006 @ 06:12:15 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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yeah, I liked it very much. I could definatly understand it. I've felt what you were trying to describe before.
very nice. Keep it up! |
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