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~Missing You So~

Contributed by pumpkinpie on Monday, 23rd February 2004 @ 04:18:19 PM in AEST
Topic: LoveRemembered



Longing souls, desolate surface of the truth
Picturesque valleys, indulgence of the youth
The smell of thick shampoo and juicy fruit
An unrequited answer inside the telephone booth

Shooting stars devoured by the endless skies
The affair never quite begun,just fully quite demised
The yearning kiss never amply bestowed
Just snitched by the sunset in a trip down the road

The daisy standing still in the desert waiting for her rain
The snow longing to catch a glimpse of the sun,it's beauty contained
The memory of a once sweet melody captured by the violin
The echo in the wind that carries the whispers of the wistful woman











Copyright © pumpkinpie ... [ 2004-02-23 16:18:19]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: ~Missing You So~ (User Rating: 1 )
by lil_angel on Monday, 23rd February 2004 @ 04:23:29 PM AEST
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This is good keep up the good work!


Re: ~Missing You So~ (User Rating: 1 )
by neglected1 on Monday, 23rd February 2004 @ 04:32:15 PM AEST
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its good.. but im being honest it really didnt grab me and pull me in ... it was kind of dull... but overall good work!!


Re: ~Missing You So~ (User Rating: 0 )
by Former_Member on Monday, 23rd February 2004 @ 06:53:50 PM AEST
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I on the other hand didn't find this dull at all i found it was written with lots of emotions and you could feel the thirst ,the need expressed through the author.you feel the sadness and it just engulfs you.i enjoyed it from beginning to end,very well done,loved the contrasts used,keep writing,Kylie-xxx-


Re: ~Missing You So~ (User Rating: 1 )
by kori31 on Monday, 23rd February 2004 @ 10:09:54 PM AEST
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Beautiful......I can definitely relate.....I feel like u read my mind...great write.......kori


Re: ~Missing You So~ (User Rating: 1 )
by DreamWeaver on Tuesday, 24th February 2004 @ 03:25:29 AM AEST
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Beautiful expression ... wistful and lovely ... Jan


Re: ~Missing You So~ (User Rating: 1 )
by Kie on Tuesday, 24th February 2004 @ 10:04:56 AM AEST
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Yep I can certainly relate. I've been there, and i'm still there! A beautiful, expressive poem. Well done. Kie


Re: ~Missing You So~ (User Rating: 1 )
by Rakerman1999 on Tuesday, 24th February 2004 @ 03:15:01 PM AEST
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so romantic...so beautifully written ( smiles)

Very well done
Roses
Larry


Re: ~Missing You So~ (User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on Tuesday, 24th February 2004 @ 09:28:43 PM AEST
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lovely images, charmingly whistful....... hugs n' love nessa


Re: ~Missing You So~ (User Rating: 1 )
by blackmarker on Monday, 10th May 2004 @ 06:09:10 PM AEST
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Great imagery.. simply beautiful!


Re: ~Missing You So~ (User Rating: 1 )
by lost_angeluk on Friday, 2nd July 2004 @ 01:40:01 PM AEST
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this is a great poem really made me think!!!!

From lost_angeluk


Re: ~Missing You So~ (User Rating: 1 )
by Overstated on Saturday, 28th August 2004 @ 01:29:38 PM AEST
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Wow this poem is so detailed and powerful i love this! I think you should be proud of this piece because as i read it, I feel that this is a poem only you could write - you've really opened up your mind to write this piece. You've stamped your identity all over this and it’s all the better for it - with lines such as 'The smell of thick shampoo and juicy fruit
An unrequited answer inside the telephone booth' I'd never of thought of those lines - it’s a pumpkinpie special of a poem...


Re: ~Missing You So~ (User Rating: 1 )
by Spazzo on Tuesday, 4th January 2005 @ 10:40:25 PM AEST
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Wonderful.

Spazzo


Re: ~Missing You So~ (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Monday, 19th September 2005 @ 03:49:40 PM AEST
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This is so powerful and creatively worded I have a lump in my throat and teared up. It also kind of relates to a time of my life I am going through. Brilliantly written :)




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