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Dying...

Contributed by butterflygirl40 on Friday, 30th December 2005 @ 12:57:24 AM in AEST
Topic: EmotionalPoetry



I am aching inside because I am acting like a fool .

I am adding that I am aging and I dont want to age.

I am always asking you am I aging and you tell me no.

I am backing off from life because I am aging.

I heard the dog barking outside and I thought to myself I must be aging.

I get where I am too lazy for bathing .

I am begging the next door neighbor for some soap.

It's like being able to forget so many things when you're aging.

I don't even want to make up the bedding because I am too lazy.

MY soul is bleeding inside because I dont want to age.

I count my blessing everyday that I can still get up out of the bed.

I am bruising a lot because I am aging .

It scares me because I dont want no one caring for me because of my aging.

I feel like I am chain to the same old walls and the same old life.

I feel like I am being cheated out of life.

I am checking in the mirror to see how many more wrinkles I have because I am aging.

I am cleaning out my closet and giving away all of my clothes that don't fit me anymore.

I look at my daughter getting older and I know she is growing up so that makes me feel old.

I am laying here and wanting to die,because I don't want to be aging and getting old.

I am thinking about leaving , because my life is like dying inside ..





Copyright © butterflygirl40 ... [ 2005-12-30 00:57:24]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: Dying... (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Friday, 30th December 2005 @ 01:30:34 AM AEST
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Geeze, I hope your reference to dying is only in a metaphroical way and your leaving means your just leaving a bad situation for a better life.

Your write has a mix of very emotional sadness with a glimmer of hope and happiness.

For you are counting your blessings everyday.

The best blessing is the miracle of your daughter.

She needs you and as for aging.....none of us can escape that. Maybe look at it as getting better through life's experiences.

She has to be one of the best experiences you've ever had. :-)

This certainly is an emotive write and tears at the ol' heart strings.

Gosh, take care of yourself and your daughter.

Tim
:-)


Re: Dying... (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Friday, 30th December 2005 @ 10:59:55 AM AEST
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boy can i relate 2 this poem, so much impact as well realy heartfelt, hang i there your not alone in those feelings, i know only 2 well what your going through great writting.

Ben


Re: Dying... (User Rating: 1 )
by hauntedscorp on Wednesday, 4th January 2006 @ 12:58:33 AM AEST
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Geez...as much as I'd like to say something sweet and reassuring to you such as Tim and Ben did...I just can't help but think; I'd feel pretty damn old too if that's all I focused on!! Don't take this the wrong way, but there's no real need for self pity here. We ALL age in numbers, yes...but we don't have to in spirit. At least not to a degree where we think we are too old simply because we're 'aging'. That's silly. Why not focus on all the things you still CAN do, and have accomplished...? I'd be willing to bet you have plenty more than many, as do I, and you should be thankful for that. The whole 'I'm dying, I'm dying' thing too...what is that??? Surely you're aware death isn't concerned with age at all...? We are capable of 'dying' even before our first breath, I assure you 'young' and 'old' has nothing to do with it. Oh and...

I count my blessing everyday that I can still get up out of the bed.


(As you very well should...)


AND....


I feel like I am being cheated out of life.


(You are! By your negative thinking...)


Thank you for commenting on my write btw, and sorry if this isn't the kind of comment you had hoped for...I just hate reading about stuff like this; sure, we can all be sad from time to time, but there is still always something to be happy about. You have a daughter...start there.


Scorp.






Re: Dying... (User Rating: 1 )
by deadheadpoet on Friday, 27th January 2006 @ 09:07:53 PM AEST
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Geez...how old are you? This seems so pathetic. Peace, Laura




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