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December Suicide
Contributed by
HERO
on
Friday, 20th February 2009 @ 11:45:12 AM in AEST
Topic:
selfstruggles
|
Theres a light in my heart that cant stand its reflection
And its bent and its broken from its own self prevention
To the higher ups it seem it is just playing dead
But when that smoke has all cleared it is still in the red
It crawls up in bed in my head and wonders why
How the others go along with the waves crashing by
Just please understand that one man cant control
December Suicide
This cancer in my head has infected the soul
December Suicide
The light in my heart is a flame that is weak
From masochistic insight it cant even speak
Its done and its tired of misunderstood pain
Just throws up its arms and lets the sky rain
Theres a light in my heart whose problems are different
Theyre all in the head, so they seem non-existent
Its fights are internal, self destructive and insane
But no one can see them, so they treat it the same
Just please understand that one man cant control
December Suicide
This cancer in my head has infected the soul
December Suicide
The light in my heart is a flame that is weak
From masochistic insight is cant even speak
Its done and its tired of misunderstood pain
Just throws up its arms and lets the sky rain
I struggle to tell you the way that I'm feeling
You dont understand it, my frustration hits the ceiling
I struggle to push myself to make it through the day
Alls I ask of you God is to make this go away
(Solo)
Theres a light in my heart and its fallen asleep
It needs to heal, its wounds are deep
No one would know because they cant even see
The battles I've seen, so I disagree
Copyright ©
HERO
... [
2009-02-20 11:45:12]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: December Suicide
(User Rating: 1 )
by Recyclebin on
Friday, 20th February 2009 @ 12:01:11 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Great piece my friend.
very deep and intense.
take a bow my friend
~Bin~ |
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Re: December Suicide
(User Rating: 1 )
by snoopington on
Friday, 20th February 2009 @ 12:18:40 PM AEST
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a Message)
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well done great write.
m............. |
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Re: December Suicide
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jenni_K on
Friday, 20th February 2009 @ 04:00:33 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Very deep piece of writing... The flow is great....I'm sure it would be a hit with the band and its followers....
Jenni |
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Re: December Suicide
(User Rating: 1 )
by BobStanley on
Friday, 20th February 2009 @ 08:01:11 PM AEST
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| I think the first two lines of the poem are the best. I know this poem is very personal to you, but as a reader who needs to relate to what you are writing about, I would have liked to see the poem jump from the first two lines of the poem. I also feel that the poem needs punctuation. I am a very literal person, so I guess if it is a song it works good. |
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Re: December Suicide
(User Rating: 1 )
by purplestary on
Saturday, 21st February 2009 @ 12:19:23 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| I thought this poem was great..very deep and i could totaly relate. I wrote a poem called Invisible Scars..It has the same kind of meaning but it's written in a different kind of form. The words you wrote remind me alot of how i was feeling when i wrote invisible scars..I love it. |
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